Apparently its inappropriate for me to be nonchalant about everything. I typically don't care about crap like hurt feelings and all this stupid girl cattiness. That seems to be wrong because some of my friends think that I should care. saying oh don't say anything, don't tell anyone to me. yeah I wont say a word, but if I say something along those lines and I encourage them to keep their mouths shut about it, it ends up blowing up in my face. And I end up loosing face with someone. That seems to be a constant in my life at the moment. I never cared before about this BS and now, they are forcing me to care, because they are all I have hear. I hardly ever see them as it is anyway. I spend most of my time alone. But that is because of my current school situation, seeing as I am part time and they are all full time. It makes me feel sick that they arn't adult enough to come up to me and talk to me. I have to be the one to chase after them if I want to hang out or anything. and if they ask me to do something with them or go somewhere, im expected to say yes.
I do have friends here that are way more adult. They are really nice and actually want me in their company. and I do appreciate that a lot. and it means a lot to me that I can talk to those people without any problem.
at this moment i'm considering just keeping to myself. Just not worry about anything and just focus on me, and what I want from life.
