I've been slowly working on my portfolio. I started to draw a lot more and I want to get some work together. I still paint, even though I havent been painting for the past 3 months. Its been really cold in my studio and most of the water is frozen. I've moved most of my painting supplies to my room so i can paint, but now they are in my basement waiting to be used.

Heart of Glass

I have a Doctors appointment on the 3rd of feb, and I'm really scared. I don't mean.. Ohhh Im scared ( like its not a big deal), I am TARIFFED.

I dont want my Doctor telling me that I have a possible change of heart disease, or anything of the sort. My father had a triple bypass when I was really young, and he almost died. And it doesnt help that I am more like my father than my mother. I don't want to have to have surgery when im in my 40's.

Im really scared. And knowone I talk to is helping me through this.

bah da bah bah bah da bah bah

I drove up to london on thursday to surprise everyone, well it wasnt much of a surprise when I texted my one friend to see if I could stay over ahaha, but it was really fun. They had a pub fundraiser to raise some money for there catalogue. I still have some money that I'm willing to donate to them but I'll need to make another trip up there.

Drawings

so I've started drawing again, they are only sketches and such, but its nice to be doing something again. I need to get a bigger extention cord if im going to have a working heater in the garage. It's been a while since I was in there. it's way to cold to paint and im pretty sure that most of my acrylics are frozen.

dead socially

Since I've been done school, I haven't been able to see any of my friends that like in London or even around where I live. And its starting to get to the point where I have to ask to go hang out? what the FUCK is that SHIT in 21 and I have to ask to go out. I've never been this depressed in my whole life. the whole reason I worked so hard to get my licence was to be able to see my friends out of town. and it doesn't make sense that i can go to cambridge which is an hour away, but I can't go to london which is also an hour away. Im under the conclusion that my mother wants to ruin my social life. I mean its already ruined. but she IS making it worse.

I miss my friends.

2011

Happy New year.

so I have a few resolutions that I wish to keep this year.

lost the weight i've gained from moving back home, stop eating fast food and eat healthier

all of which are closely tied together right? yeah. this year i really dont want to let myself down like the years before. because I want to get healthier and live better.

so today was the last day for junk food. no more after today. im going to cut back on my coffee intake as well

I really hope I can stick to this.

cheers.